Week 1 Marriage Course

I will be using this blog throughout the semester to record my thoughts on what I have been studying, and how best I can apply this to my life and how it can be applied to others as well!

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Week 8

Based on your observations or life experiences, what have you learned about pride? That it sneaks up on you. I don't think anyone views themselves as prideful. Right now I am watching a show where the main protagonist, is very prideful, but she doesn't see it as being prideful. I think this is a good example of how we can be blindsided by our own pride. It is really easy to see it in others, but less in ourselves.  From your observations, what are the little ways in which pride is manifest in marriage? Making decisions for the other spouse. Doing things to undermine because your way is better. Feeling that you know best for the relationship and your spouses feelings don't matter as much. Feeling like you are the better person, because of whatever, whether you do more "good things" or whatnot. No matter what, we aren't better then anyone else.  Examine recent interactions with your spouse or someone close to you. When your spouse (or someone clo...
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Week 13

It is hard to think about this being the last week! I have benefited from this class, and feel it has been a good learning experience. My parents always stressed the importance of staying out of debt. They had accumulated about half a million in debt before going bankrupt and ending up having to learn how to get by. My husband and I try to be as thrifty as possible, and we have agreed that we will never buy a car that is less then 5 years old. We don't do credit cards(unless they are paid off right away) and try to save as much as possible for the future. My husbands parents live paycheck to paycheck, even though they make a good bit of money - they don't budget very well(in our opinions at least) though we don't know all of their bills, it just seems like it to us. We try to only have essentials and are careful with our money for the most part. We're getting better about it but its only been in the last year that we've really started looking to the future. ...
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Week 10

In a nutshell, explain in your own words what is needed to overcome gridlock (Gottman)? Being upfront and honest about our hang ups. Also to be respectful of what is important to our partners. We all have different dreams. Even if I don't understand why it is important, it doesn't make it any less important then my dreams. As we get older, I have found that I can give my husband more room for his dreams, because I have learned how it is so important for me to have mine, and he needs that same courtesy.  What is the central message of Gottman's book? "Here's how I can accurately predicate marriage failure rate. This is why, this is how you can be prepared for success in the future, and also know that some of what you are told about marriage just isn't true." What is the most important thing you learned from Gottman's book? That marriage is both simple and complex and that things are never as they seem. What is the central message of G...
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